On Freaking Out

This Friday morning I am embarking on a 6 month long trip to India, Nepal, Thailand, and Malaysia, never spending more than a month at one spot and more than six weeks doing any one thing. In the next five days and especially in the last 48 hours I will: pack six months of things I need into one backpack that weighs less than 50 pounds, pack up and move out of my apartment, prepare things to be sent over to myself with friends at one or two points throughout my trip, ship my car cross country, finish applying to graduate school, and tie up loose ends at 3 jobs. As I made this list on Friday afternoon and reflected on the fact that I am not freaking out yet, I decided that I must have serious mental issues or some powerful drug has been inadvertently mixed into my coffee in the morning.

Then I started freaking out.

Anyway, now that I am not nervous about leaving the country for 6 months I am beginning to wonder if I again have serious mental issues or if the true meaning of that statement has yet to hit me.

But what is there to freak out about, really? When I land in the Delhi airport on Saturday evening I will be meeting old dear friends and making new ones, living in a beautiful place that I believe I have the tools from last year to enjoy to an even greater degree. And the rest of the trip will continue to be filled with beautiful places, precious people, and exciting experiences. So when I begin to freak out - IF I begin to freak out, I'll let you know.